“But Enough About You; Let’s Talk About Me”

The Rev. Dr. Skip Ferguson

Manassas Presbyterian Church

Manassas, Virginia

June 7, 2015

“But Enough About You; Let’s Talk About Me”

Luke 16:10

It was a wonderful cartoon in The New Yorker magazine:

a couple sitting at a table in a restaurant,

in the midst of dinner,

apparently on a first date,

when one says to the other,

“But enough about you;

Let’s talk about me.”

I saw the cartoon some years ago,

long before the term “selfie”

became part of our vocabulary,

but it reflected a trend that’s been going on

for quite some time in our society.

                                            

We live in an increasingly “selfie” era;

we seem to be losing a sense of community

as we turn more and more inward,

more and more focused on ourselves.

A book I read recently cited studies

that show that we are becoming a

more and more narcissistic society.

Do you remember Narcissus

from your high school mythology?

He was the one who was so fascinated

by his own reflection in a pool of water,

his own “selfie,”

that he lost sight of everything and everyone else,

the world around him.

The lyrics of that popular song

that is so annoyingly infectious

could be probably rewritten:

“Because you know I'm all about myself

‘bout myself, no others,;

I’m all about myself, ‘bout myself…”

We’re teaching our young to focus on,

what David Brooks, in his new book,

“The Road to Character”,

calls “resumé virtues”;

those virtues that will set them apart,

and distinguish them from others

in a highly competitive world,

a highly competitive workplace:

Things like graduating with honors,

captaining the soccer team,

serving as president of the student council.

These are wonderful accomplishments, of course,

things rightly to be proud of.

But Brooks argues that we’ve become

so obsessed with “resumé virtues”

that we’re losing sight of what he calls,

“eulogy virtues,”

those things about us that reflect

character more than accomplishment:

inner goodness,

rather than outer glory and glamour.

                                                                       

He calls them “eulogy virtues”,

a term I will say I like,

because they are the things

that people will remember long after

they’ve forgotten all those accomplishments

on our resumés.

                                     

Brooks thesis is that while

accomplishments are important –

we all want to succeed –

what matters is character.

                          

A simple example of character: two different people ask

“how are you?”

You know the first person who asked the question

did so in a glib, uninterested way;

he clearly wasn’t interested in your response;

he was more interested in telling you how he was.

                                                     

But when the second person asked,

you knew she meant it;

you knew she really wanted to know how you are

and was ready to listen,

ready to focus on you,

rather than herself.

We Christians get caught up in “resumé virtues”

as much as anyone else,

not only in our own personal lives

but even in our lives as disciples,

our lives in the church.

                                   

It is easy to succumb to the same temptation

that James and John did,

those sons of Zebedee,

pushed by their mother

to seek seats of honor

on Jesus’ right and Jesus’ left;

leading Jesus to teach them and us,

“Whoever wishes to be great among you

must be your servant…

just as the Son of Man came not to be served,

but to serve.”

(Matthew 20:20ff)

Another time, Jesus was asked by his disciples,

“Who is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven?”

In response, Jesus pointed to a child,

a child who had no resumé virtues,

and said,

“Whoever becomes humble like this child

is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”

(Matthew 18:1-5)

Jesus calls us to lives that can seem so out of sync

with what our society teaches us.

It is up to us to choose which path we follow.

We can follow our Lord,

listen to him,

and learn from him.

Or we can sit in the back of the classroom,

texting our friends,

as we make Jesus our personal chaplain,

there to approve and bless what we do,

rather than guide us, lead us,

teach and and transform us –

help us to develop character.

Our lesson, that single verse from Luke’s gospel,

has always been so instructive to me,

“Whoever is faithful in a very little

is faithful also in much,

and whoever is dishonest in a very little

is dishonest also in much.”

(Luke 16:10)

The lesson speaks to the very essence of character,

the lesson speaks to the very essence of virtue.

The lesson speaks to how Jesus calls us

to live our lives.

Brooks argues that character is grounded in humility,

and isn’t that what God teaches us,

what our Lord Jesus Christ teaches us:

to walk humbly?

Some two hundred years

before the birth of our Lord,

the Roman philosopher Cato wrote,

“I would rather men should ask

why no statue has been erected in my honor,

than why one has.”

That was a quotation my grandfather

always kept on his desk,

a reminder that it wasn’t his success in business

that ultimately mattered;

but rather what mattered was his life,

his life as a child of God,

his life as a disciple of Christ,

his life in service to others,

in his community, his church, his home,

in all the world.

Those are things I remember about him,

and they are the things I spoke of

when I gave the eulogy at his funeral.

Gary Trudeau, the creator of

the comic strip Doonesbury, has said,

“We live in an age where people

would rather be envied

than esteemed.”

That’s the “selfie” path,

the path that’s “all about myself, ‘bout myself.”

It is not a path that builds community

or character.

It isn’t a path that’s walked humbly.

It isn’t the path of discipleship

Our resumés don’t define who we are.

Who we are reflects whose we are.

When we remember whose we are;

when we live our lives guided

by whose we are,

then who we become

will be a women and men of goodness,

compassion,

selflessness;

men and women who walk humbly,

seeking no statues or glory,

but seek simply to follow,

follow our Lord Jesus Christ.

AMEN